Top Ten Things You Don’t Want to Hear During
Vacation Bible School
10. There’s a minor problem with the air conditioning. We should get it fixed by Friday.
9. We’re running low on refreshments, so we fed the kids chocolate candy and Mountain Dew.
8. Can you come and talk to the first graders? They’ve been crying ever since this morning’s lesson on the Lake of Fire.
7. Using a hammer is too difficult for our fourth graders, so we gave them a nail gun to build their bird houses.
6. What time were the children supposed to be back from the field trip to the maximum security prison?
5. Can you help for a few minutes with the four-year-olds? A couple of teachers left the room screaming.
4. No one told us they were permanent markers.
3. We thought paper towels would be okay since we were out of toilet paper.
2. Our substitute pianist doesn’t know the sit-down or stand-up chords, but he’s memorized a lot of Broadway show tunes.
1. My teachers and I thought this would be a good time to tell the kids that Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy are really messengers of Satan.